Hello Tuesday

Getting a late start on hanging with my girl Lisa for Hello Monday.

Hello Tuesday and spending some time writing from a new spot today since our home wifi is acting up, which is why I didn’t post yesterday.

Hello 10 year anniversary! yup! 10 years! Were were babies when we got married (21 and 24). Our friends all though we were crazy, but we were crazy in love and after a one year dating relationship, Kyle proposed and 5 and a half months later we said “I do” Then a couple months ago Kyle surprised me with a vow renewal in Maui and we said “I do” again. Saying those words the second time around had so much more meaning, so much more life, depth and understanding. When you get married young, struggles seems so obsolete and it’s not till you’ve lived through them that you fully understand what those words mean and how much they resonate to the depths of your soul and encompass your whole being.

Hello to a delicious dinner a Selanne Steak Tavern in Laguna Beach. They gave us a beautiful table on the deck where we could watch the sunset over the ocean and not be bombarded with a ton of people around us talking. There were 5 tables on the deck and most of them weren’t occupied till we were tasting our macaroons. Selanne’s is known for their steak and their custom infused cocktails and drinks. We shared a fantastic meal that combined steak and seafood and I left wishing they would let me take cooking lessons from the chef. My favorite part of each course was the decadent sauces they served over each dish.

It was such a romantic way to celebrate 10 years, sharing back over our favorite memories, talking about our kids and looking into the future.

Hello to spending our Saturday morning up early and at the soccer field (one of the reasons we didn’t go away for our anniversary). Katie’s team did such a great job and they won their second game of the season 6-2, with Kate playing goalie for half of the game.

Hello to lunch at our favorite spot, Ruby’s Diner, which just launched their awesome new concept where you order at the counter and then sit and wait for your food. We loved the vibe, the new and unique menu items and the great atmosphere.

Hello to enjoying time with friends on Saturday night. An evening out with great food and fun conversation is always a great way to spend the weekend. The restaurant even brought us a yummy mini dessert so we could extend our celebration into the weekend.

I’ve had a few people ask me this week how to keep your marriage alive after 10 years, so here’s 4 tips that have worked for me.

1.) Making God a Priority. This is easier said than done, always. It’s easy to stay Christ focused when things are going great and your struggles and hardships are at bay, it’s a whole ‘nother thing when it’s not. Kyle and I have been through our fair share of ups and downs and learning to lean on God through them was a very important lesson we learned from the beginning. When you make Christ your center, you feel his blessings even during the deepest ebs and flows of your marriage. Pray together often, make church a priority and most importantly teach your kids how to be prayer warriors too. They need to see you praying together so they understand how to make that an innate part of who they are as they grow up.

2.) Flirt with your Husband. give him the “eye,” girls you know what I’m talking about. text him you’re thinking about him during the day, use some descriptive language to do it. For a long time I felt shy for whatever reason about this, but seriously, why?! He’s my husband, getting descriptive only sets the mood.

3.) Date your Husband. even if you take him lunch at the office while the kids are at school, find ways to spend time alone. There have even been nights where we’ve ordered take out and enjoyed a meal after the kids went to bed so we could have some time together. we also make it a point to have lunch together once a week. i love it, he loves it, combine it with flirting and it makes it so much more fun.

4.) Spice up your sex life. When I say that, I mean have sex when it’s not scheduled on the calendar or after date night. I promise the flirting will get you in the mood. Our sex life is so much more fun and active than it was 10 years ago and I think a healthy sex life only makes for a better marriage. And if you need to get in the mood, there are plenty of books out there that can help you with that. 😉

5.) Keep the communication lines open. talk to each other and not just about the kids. Be genuinely interested in what’s going on in your spouses life, work and how they are feeling and when you share, share it a way that doesn’t make it sound like a complaint. Communication doesn’t happen when it begins with one or the other of you feeling like you’re on the defense.

And with that I’m saying Hello to a new week of possibilities and, of course, work, playdates, ballet and soccer. I’m also going to be headed to Creative Tea Time on Saturday, will I see any of you there?

What are you saying Hello to this week?

xo, Alissa