The Wall Street Journal wrote an article a couple weeks ago that wholeheartedly mocked mommy bloggers. It went on to share graphics of how women behave at conferences + how they use them as a way to escape the reality of their lives. Screw carpooling, school drop off and cooking and cleaning and trade it in for champagne, junk food and partying with your friends. Of course, why would blogging be considered an actual job right? Those mommy bloggers you all so smugly mock are probably making more than what you make in a year and have more influence than you could probably expunge from your pinky finger as it types so self righteously on your computer. Brands are learning all to well that the influence and ability to reach a current and new consumer now goes far beyond a pieces of black and white paper that, mostly likely, will be painted on tomorrow by my crafty children. You want to make a piñata kids? Sure, I’ve got the perfect paper to tear up, cover in glue and beat with a stick. Their influence lives on in an online space where people can share it, tweet it, pin it and find it for, well, forever.
What really get’s my panties in a twist is that the article is written by a woman and what’s more a woman who is “friends” with women she refers to as “Mommy Bloggers.” It’s not bad enough that everyday in this business women have to push for men to understand the importance of paying for endorsements from highly influential bloggers, but now women are attacking as well.
If this influence was indeed ridicule worthy, then brands wouldn’t compensate bloggers to blog about their brands in order to reach a bigger and more genuine audience? And further, why would they do it again and again if it wasn’t working? Just because you puff up your chest Mr. Wall Street Journal + pretend to know what you’re talking about doesn’t distract us “Mommy Bloggers” from seeing right through the facade. I’m personally, a very hard working Mom. I run a business, publish content on this blog and take care of a family + a home… and when traveling to a conference, I’m of the opinion that working hard and playing hard can go hand in hand. No one pokes fun at the big fortune 500 companies who treat their employees to week long, all expense paid trips filled with all the luxurious one could ever want, then hold a 3 hour training session once and call it a business trip. I smell the bullshit from a mile away.
And while much of what was said was crap, it’s true that bloggers don’t take pictures of the work, it’s just assumed it’s happening. We share the relational side of what we do, the people we meet, the champagne we drink, the cupcakes we indulge in. You know what? I’m 100% ok with that! In fact, I personally went out of my way to showcase all the fun we were having. Why? Because at the end of the day, I know how I am + the power of what “Mommy Bloggers” can do. So Mr. Wall Street Journal, cheers! For a moment you managed to make yourself and other women look like assholes.
All crap aside, last weekend I headed to Laguna Niguel for Mom 2.0 Summit, a conference sponsored by Dove + the amazing new initiative to show women that they are beautiful from the inside out #GirlUnstoppable. I met some incredible women + spoke to many brands who understand the power of social marketing. If you were to ask me if I love it, I would say yes! In fact, I’ve already bought my ticket for next year.
Taylor @DearOlympia.com says
So well said! I agree that more and more, companies are and should be learning that marketing must include women and moms. I left a corporate career in law to start a blog and furniture refinishing business and, yes, I have a more flexible schedule but I put in a lot of hours. Also, bloggers are usually self-employed meaning if we aren’t successful, we don’t get paid. Most mommy bloggers are extremely hard working and innovative. In short, PREACH!! I love this quote:
“No one pokes fun at the big fortune 500 companies who treat their employees to week long, all expense paid trips filled with all the luxurious one could ever want, then hold a 3 hour training session once and call it a business trip. I smell the bullshit from a mile away.”
Maddie Richardson says
OH my goodness. This post made me laugh so hard. I COMPLETELY agree with you, Alissa. And I think the fact that this article was written by a woman is embarrassing. Sorry our job is more fun than yours. Well, sorry I’m not sorry 🙂
Alissa Circle says
My words exactly…. my job is more fun that yours, now take your jealousy Ms. Wall Street Journal and go home! period. the end.
April Orozco says
GUURRRLLLL….don’t get me started on this topic! My mom is a business woman for a very well-known paint company and tells me horrid stories of how her male co-workers act on her trips. The only difference is you ladies have the sense of humer and balls to post them for everyone to see.
Keep your chin up girl….Rome wasn’t built in a day.
xoxo
april
Shannah @ Just Us Four says
I am totally giving you a virtual standing ovation right now! I could not agree with you more on every single thing you wrote up there. It is embarassing and sad that the article was written but to be written by a woman is tragic. As women {most than ever}, we need to build and support each other…not take every opportunity to squash the successes that are hard fought.
BRAVO!
Kristin says
That piece was written by someone who generalized and didn’t do enough research. When I “escape” on business trips, there’s a whole lot of work going on…even thought I’m a lowly blogger. Ha!
Bonnie @ Uncommon says
Well said! 😉
Alissa Circle says
Thanks Bonnie!
Heather @ Glitter and Gloss says
Reason #5,913 that I love you! Excellent response to an absolutely ridiculous article. So well said!
Alissa Circle says
thanks friend! it’s too bad that we even have to have this conversation right? xo
Emily Crider says
LOVE THIS! Very well said 🙂
Alissa Circle says
thank you!
Danielle says
You are SO right about this Alissa! I can’t believe someone would write an article bashing on mommy bloggers. If only they knew YOU and how much you juggle so beautifully!
We really do have a large influence online when it comes to promoting brands and their products. Our blog posts are showing up in Google search results and some of our content is being promoted on the store’s website for all their customers can see. But I guess Mr. WSJ doesn’t realize those things.
This post was so well spoken! You go girl!
Alissa Circle says
Exactly! What’s worse is that a woman wrote the article. that’s what gets my panties in a knot.
Amanda says
Yes, I do agree you have a very valid point. But I am a corporate employee, a part-time mom-prenueur in my “spare time” and a devoted wife and mom. And while I agree corporate trips can be thinly veiled booze schmoozes, I will say that at least on corporate trips they tend to be all inclusive with women, men, and various diversity. The “mom” conferences tend to be cliques with WAHM’s, and I am sure you would say that you rarely see men, corporate moms, or much diversity at those conferences. It tends to be the WASP meets WAHM’s group, and as an outsider looking in, my perception could be totally wrong. The WSJ article was definitely “those women” and you tended to make your response to the article as “those people” as well. I just wish there were more people engaging in the “hard-working-no-matter-where-you-work-moms” club where we all support each other. Even dads work super hard these days, so I don’t even want to make it a “mom” thing. We parents need to stick together!! You make great points, but as my mom always says, don’t judge others until you walk a mile in their shoes.
jeannett says
Actually, I met many women who blogged “on the side” beyond their full time professional jobs…and yes, there were only about 5 “Dad bloggers”…but what do you really expect from a conference called Mom 2.0? When my husband attends conferences for his aerospace engineering profession, it’s 95% male. Is that because the conference is discriminating against women? No. Because that is the nature of the business (which is sad, but that’s another conversation entirely). You can’t go to a Mom Blogging Conference and be shocked that there are few men…and the truth is that the landscape of mom blogging happens to be mostly SAHM (not all, of course), but likely the majority. It’s the profession demographic. Nothing else.
Alissa Circle says
I kinda love you. period. the end. Us assholes need to stick together. xo
Amanda says
Your exactly right, and I think your comments are exactly what the article was trying to convey, that these conferences are geared towards the WAHM demographic and while corporate moms and dads get a social fix from work and corporate functions, WAHM’s benefit from the social aspect that these conferences provide. She also noted how important this demographic is to marketing from major brands like Dove and such, so I think everyone sees the value, whether for social or profession purposes. My point about diversity is more in relation to all the photos I’ve seen posted from various attendees, and it seems like they are all middle age white women, whereas with corporate functions you get all ages and races etc. not so much about men vs. women. You bring great points and I appreciate your point of view! This was a great topic to discuss!!
Karri says
That is so very true, Jeannett. But I’ve been to both…a blogging conference (ok, so it was only one big one so far and one mini) and to lots of work-related conferences when I was in the corporate world and I have to say…there wasn’t all that fun and partying after the day’s classes were over. Not bashing blogging conferences by any mean (because dude, I am a blogger). But also – sometimes, perception -what the outside world is seeing from the photos posted by bloggers – plays a huge part.
Am I making sense?
Alissa Circle says
I would agree with you that we shouldn’t judge until we walk a mile in their shoes, which was exactly my point in pointing my finger at the stupidity of the woman at Wall Street Journal who has no idea about “mommy bloggers” as she put it. She lumped us all in a group, and sterotyped us as lazy lushes who want to forego all responsibility and sleep in, drink and eat junk food. Yet I’m sure that if I put her job in a box and defined it so thinly she would have a great many things to say back to me in offense. I might have attended a conference by a beach last weekend, but I also connected with major online publications and large brands about ways to improve marketing strategies using bloggers, something I have first hand experience in seeing that I run a blogging agency where we help brands create social blogging campaigns. I’m in no way trying to say that any job is unimportant, but merely the opposite. All jobs that men and women hold are important + there are aspects of all jobs that are fun, but that doesn’t mean there’s no work involved. I do appreciate your comment and feedback and your support of men and women supporting each other in the workplace.
saralie says
You go girl. Although I am not a mommy blogger (which I wish I was) I follow many m-bloggers and LOVE LOVE it….they are people I can actually relate to!!
Alissa Circle says
girl you need to start a blog!
Heidi @ Mom's Crafty Space says
GREAT response, Alissa! I hear this so often, and I always bite my tongue because I’m so non-confrontational, but this is fantastic! Maybe the next time I hear someone put down blogging and act like it’s a joke and not a job I’ll just direct them here 😉
Alissa Circle says
thank you Heidi. I’m often a very non-confrontational person as well. in fact i normally wouldn’t write this kind of post, but i just felt the need to share my two cents. And yes, be sure to direct them here and I’ll tell them what’s up. hehe
Elizabeth Flora Ross says
This is awesome! An excellent response. I ‘m glad I followed a link to this post from FB. I wrote one today about how the biggest road block to women is, well, women:
http://www.themompledgeblog.com/2013/05/road-blocks.html
It’s shameful.
Alissa Circle says
thank you Elizabeth! I’m glad you followed too. I agree that the biggest road block to women in business is other women! I hope this changes!
jeannett says
And you know, it’s not just about it being “assumed” that I’m working…but here’s the thing: when I’m pitching WHIRLPOOL I’m busy. I’m not snapping instas. When I’m having a serious conversation with the rep from the UNITED NATIONS (oh yes, the UN), I’m not tweeting. When I’m talking to DISNEY about writing for them, I’m not on Facebook. I have the time and wherewithall to tweet, FB, insta, stumble, tumble, and pin when the day’s work is over. Period. So if it looks like all I did was lounge by the pool at the Ritz Carlton, so be it. But you’ll know that isn’t true in a few months when those partnerships come to fruition. Period.
People can mock all they want. I do more in my pajamas at 5 in the morning than most men get done all damn day.
And yes, I’m kinda ticked. The end.
Karri says
Sorry I am replying to you again 😉 I totally totally agree with you. I think, though, that is the picture that people who don’t blog…people who don’t understand blogging…get. So is it a blogger’s job to help them get over that hump and their lame-ass perception? Or just ignore them and keep on keepin’ on?
Amanda says
Karri, you nailed it! If the mom bloggers want to change perception then they need to push more photos of their “work” world instead of their social world. But if they truly love the social aspect of the job and want to attend the conferences for that purpose, which is PERFECTLY fine, then they just need to ignore the naysayers and keep on keepin’ on. You make a great point. I’m not trying to jab the bloggers, I think they should do what they do and make no bones about it, but then don’t get honked off at perception when all they post is middle aged, white girl, sorority photos of themselves hamming it up at these conferences. Tis the difference between corporate “bullshit” functions as she calls them versus these mommy conferences. I’m not pro or con either one, I was trying to bring up healthy discussion because I see both sides. Appreciated reading your input!
Alyson @EisleyRae says
Yup!
jeannett says
I TOTALLY get what you girls are saying. Perception can be everything, and if all we are insta-ing (like how I just made that a verb! Ha!) is the fun parts, what else do we expect??? Right?
BUT. Think about it from this perspective:
1) My husband travels regularly to multi-day conferences. He calls me daily. 99.999999% of the time it’s when he is just waking up and still in the hotel bed…or it’s on his way to a dinner meeting where he will drink wine and eat prime rib. If I took those phone calls as the only way to judge his behavior at these conferences, I would be left to assume that he leaves me a single mom to four kids for the better part of the week simply so he can lounge around in a nice hotel and eat fancy meals while I eat the crusts off my kids’ PBJs. But of course that’t not true. He calls me during those times not because that’s all he does while he’s gone…but because that’s when HE HAS THE TIME to call me. The rest of the day he’s busting his tail feather and WORKING. HARD. He eats like a King. He sleeps in really nice beds he doesn’t have to make. But he’s not about to call me mid-meeting with NASA just to prove to me he’s working. And really, why do I, the “Mommy blogger” have to prove it??? Do men have to prove this stuff?
2) Do you REALLY want to see pictures of me taking notes? I mean, truly. Would it be appropriate to stop mid-sentence when you are brainstorming with a major brand so that you can “prove” the conversation is happening? “Oh, hold on National Geographic, I need my readers to know I”m not just at a sorority party all weekend…would you mind?” Should I then tweet a screenshot of my inbox the day after the conference? And must I prove I’m working at all???? I mean, isn’t the “proof in the pudding” when you read my blog? Do THOUSANDS of posts’ worth suddenly be negated after two days of “Hey! Here I am having a laugh with my friends!” pictures???? I work HARD. I’d like to think I do a little bit of good. How is it that it is so easily swept under the rug?
3) Are there more social aspects to blogging conferences than at other conferences? Maybe…but maybe not. It just looks different because we know each other!!! Isn’t that the beauty of blogging? The relationships? The community? The way we connect? Isn’t that why blogging exists at all?! During Mom 2.0 there was a conference for insurance reps of some sort. And you know what? They ::gasp:: had a night time party! There was wine, music, and it was even on the very same lawn as the “Mom Blogger” party!!! WHAT?! The mood was definitely different. There were no selfies, there didn’t seem to be very much laughing, and frankly, it was a snooze fest. The same scenario…but completely different. Is it because bloggers are just “white sorority girls”? (Which, really…that was offensive, but thanks for the indirect put down…) No. It’s because we’ve cried over each other’s stories. We’ve helped spread the word when another blogger’s baby was born still. We’ve rallied when her house burned to the ground. We’ve laughed at her minivan stories. We have built businesses, communities and networks on the very foundation of connection. Capturing the connections that happen over across a country is a natural outlay of that. We ARE A COMMUNITY. WE ARE FRIENDS.
And I will not apologize for having friends. Friends who support, love, affirm, encourage, and love. Internet or otherwise.
Jill says
I cannot explain how awesome you are, Jeannett. You hit the nail on the head and am so grateful to be a part if this amazing community of women.
Amanda says
You had me at points one and two. It did make me re-evaluate my preceptions and I think you really made some very true points. But with point three, it just seems like it’s more of the same, with the conferences being social, friend gatherings with the girls. Which is GREAT, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that, but it ties back to the article that these are just social gatherings for WAHMs. Perhaps the article could have been a bit more tactiful, but overall I think she was just saying what you said in your 3rd point. This WAHM demographic is a specific network of women and there is a huge cash cow in these conferences that sponsor getaways to help moms refresh and reload. And I’m sure the conferences help inspire, create, and attendees leave with a clear mind and renewed spirit for what they do. Again, nothing wrong with that, so just call a spade a spade. I sincerely apologize for any remark regarding the diversity of these groups of women.
Regardless that we agree to disagree, you’ve still converted me to follow your blog because you’re obviously passionate about what you do and not just “checking in” your posts and commentary. I truly applaud you for being a working mother, like most of us, I certainly know how hard it is. And most definitely I’m not too proud to say that if you ever run into me at a mom conference I will be one of those sleeping in, partying late, and enjoying a “breather’ from my everyday responsibilities so that I can spend the last day missing my kids like crazy and dying to get home 🙂 And worth every penny.
Mandy @ in the Fashion Lane says
Holy Hell. I could not be more proud of you right now! This was well written and showcases the other side of the article. Any journalist/writer really needs to research and realize that there are three sides to every story/issue. You articulated yourself and acknowledged the other side. Thanks for sharing and for being open and honest. That is why bloggers have clout!
XXO
Olivia @ the more i see the less i know says
LOVE IT!
Awesome post. And in all seriousness, I blog for fun… without the work and it’s still a bit challenging to keep up with. I cannot fathom all that you do, I know you girls go above and beyond and probably go without the recommended amount of sleep.
Shame on them. And good for you for speaking out!
And I want to go to that conference. It looks fun 🙂
And I wonder if that writer is also a Mother, because work can be a bit of an escape… is that bad to say? I’m a photographer. I do commercial work and also weddings and the occasional family. I look forward to the weddings I photograph and the Hot Mama store I photographed last week in Columbus and this week in Dayton. It’s fun to be a part of something like that. To use my talent creativity and you’re your own boss. And just because I enjoy my job, doesn’t mean I won’t sit down tomorrow for probably 12 hours straight editing images and sending digital files to my printing company and bit a bit frazzled.
I smell jealously… with a dash of bullshit. I’m glad you called it out.
Amelia Winslow says
Great post, Alissa. I (obviously) agree! This article was way off. But I also agree with Olivia in her comment above — seems like jealousy was part of the motive of the article! After all, what mom doesn’t want trips to Laguna with a group of brilliant women to be part of her “work”?!!
Kelly @ Texas Type A Mom says
I’d like to know who the bloggers are that this writer has come across that have planted such ideas in her head. I went to my first blogging conference last weekend and was apprehensive about leaving my family in favor of doing something for my career (blogging). And I’m shy – I pushed out of my comfort zone to go network with people I don’t know in helps of growing my brand. I didn’t sleep any later than I usually do and was never sitting still for very long at all. Oh to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes.
Sarah @ Craft Quickies says
GREAT article!!! Amen, amen, and AMEN!
Sarah says
While not a “mommy blogger” I am a mom who blogs… and works. Great post. No one will ever understand the amount of work that goes into a great blog. Thanks for sticking up for us. 🙂