I feel like this is the point in my fitness journey where I should be spewing sunshine and flowers. Where I should be floating on clouds of muscles being built and talking about where I’ve been and where I’m going. Except that’s not where I’m at. The last couple weeks of workout have been challenging. I’ve dreaded the thought of going. When I began working out I feel as though I went through a season of hardship trying to overcome the learning curve to just make it through the warm up without passing out in front of my friends + people I had just met. I remembered feeling overwhelmed watching some of them blow past me, shuffling like it’s their job.
Then as I began to build strength and endurance the excitement kicked in + the addiction started. Many of you witnessed it via all those 6am Instagram pics. I mean who the hell gets up by choice to work out at 6am. I did! June 19 marks 4 months of this fitness journey for me and I feel as though I’ve fallen into a rut. My scale hates me, I know I’m not supposed to look at it. I’m supposed to be grateful for the inches I’m loosing, except for the fact that some weeks they’re gone and others they reappear, then disappear again. I’m far too much a visual person to mess around with a scale that must laugh in my face every time I step on it + inches that are doing more teasing that disappearing lately.
I know exactly what’s causing this rut, yet I can’t shake it. I can’t shake going to workout every day and seeing where other’s journey’s have taken them and I can’t help but be reminded where I’m not. There was a time when I would look at my friends + be able to say, “yes, that’s what I’ll look like in 2 months, 4 months, 6 months from now.” See I’m very good at comparing my beginning to others middles. Sound familiar? Yes, I still try to keep up with those more advanced than me + count it an accomplishment if I don’t die on the process + even pride myself on being so sore that night I can’t move, because I know it means I pushed myself to do better, work harder that day.
It’s funny how even as I sit here writing this how therapeudic it can be. I feel like part of sharing this journey is being honest about the good, the bad and the ugly. And let me tell you, there are some ugly moments. Like when I have sweat dripping out of glands I never knew existed. Or the fact that I feel like the longer I work out the sweatier I get during my workouts. Gross! I really hate sweat! As I was sitting here, hemming and hawing over whether to even hit publish on a post that gives you insight into my frustrations and the fact that I may come off as ungrateful for even the distance that I’ve come in this journey in such a short time, I noticed that the picture I use at the top of my journey post is similar to the one Cristina took of me today. The only difference, well let me show you….
In this exercise we use the TRX to do bicep lifts. Once positioned, we use our biceps to pull us up. 2 sets of 20 we did today. We were challenged to go as low as we could go. The top picture is me doing bicep lifts 2 and a half months ago after my first measure day + the picture below is the one Cristina took today. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s almost as if God knew I needed the reminder that at every point in this journey there will always be some kind of beginning and some kind of middle for me. But that’s just it…. for me. Not one to be shared, not one that should come with comparison. I need to remember that this is my journey and everyones will look different. Will I ever be the 103 lbs I was in high school or the 117lbs I was when I got married, most likely not. But I can choose to be happy with where I’m at in this journey.
I can remember the friendships it has brought me. Friendships that come with sweat, tears, high fives, butt slaps, boob size comparisons, muscle flexing, nicknames and lots of laughter. I can focus on how those friendships have changed me inside and out for the better + that I have the best trainer in the world! Who works us just as hard as she loves us through each workout. I can remember that every bead of sweat that drips off my body during workout is a visual reminder of where I’ve come and more importantly, where I’m going.
I need to also remember what this journey has done for my children. My children who used to bring their iPads and sit and watch their Disney apps if they had to go to work out with me, who are now begging to come and workout with us. Katelyn even challenged herself to try the TRX a couple weeks ago and she rocked it like a boss. I’m teaching my kids the importance of working hard in all aspects of our lives. That even when it’s tough we need to suck it up and do it anyway because we know we will feel better about ourselves in the end.
So despite the last couple weeks of struggle, I’m hoping that these next few weeks before I share again I can turn my frown upside down, sort to speak. I need to not give up on myself or my journey. And I want to thank you all for walking this journey with me and loving and encouraging me along the way! I’m truly blessed!
Oh and before I forget, here’s this months measurements. I know I’m a little late sharing since I was measured on May 29.
Things I’m most excited about: The fact that I’ve lost 1/2 in off my shoulders, 1 1/4in off my hips, 1/2in off my gluts
Things I need to remember: I get measured every 4 weeks vs the normal 6 weeks and depending on what workouts I make it to during the week certain parts of my body will fluctuate, but over all I feel as though I have more of a definitive shape to my body now.
Goals: To really focus on changing some of my eating habits to help with some drop some of the lbs on top of inches.
Till next time friends!
Manda says
My friend is going through a weight loss herself. She hated walking.. then finally she got in a regiment of going to the gym 2 and then 3 and then 4 x a week. Exercises at home and hikes now. You can tell the major difference. She has this crazy motivation now. I am guessing that is how you feel.
I lost weight in my legs from walking and that made me feel pretty good. I would love to know what to do to lose that under arm dingle dangle. Oh yes that’s what I said 🙂 I basically walk & stretch (just because of my health). Best thing I did was change to drinking lots of water!
Dana at Happy Little Lovelies says
Alissa…you are doing such an amazing thing for your body. Just the consistency and perseverance mentally is SO huge. Sometimes I think the hardest work at the beginning of any major change is to train your mind to take over the body….that’s HARD….and you’re doing it! Once your brain knows what it is to work hard and push through, the body follows. And personally, I know eating is key (I’ve heard body builders say abs are earned in the kitchen), but genetics play a role too. Anyway, just want to say that you’ve inspired me. My hubby and I are wrapping up our whole30 challenge and I’ve had great results, but I haven’t been working out much lately so thank you for sharing this.
Tamara @ The Workout Mama says
You look amazing! Keep up the great work :). You are totally doing this the right way. You have your fitness routine established and you are spot on about the nutrition playing a key role in your results. Awesome job!
Andrea Worley says
you look amazing! keep it up. so exciting about your kids getting involved too!
i’ve noticed since working out that my little girl gets excited and “trys” to do it too. it’s the cutest thing ever to see a lil 3 year old try to 30 day shred with me! 🙂
makes me excited that she’s learning to be healthy too.
Angela Livingston says
Keep working hard momma! Fitness really only accounts for 20% with nutrition being the other 80%, make sure you drink LOTS of water, and lots of fruits but even more veggies. I’m doing my second session of an 8 week Body Back (similar to boot camp). During the first session I was on fire! I lost 8 lbs and 8 inches with 4.5 being in my waist! I just started the second session, but I am having a hard time. My step son just graduated and turns 18, my emotional state is getting the best of me. We all get in ruts, but we have to remember why we are doing it, the hard work will pay off, you just have to push through it. xoxo
Courtney @ Journey of a Dreamer says
This fitness journey is about SO much more than fitness. It has been deeply spiritual and emotional for me. It can be hard when you don’t feel like you are getting what you deserve in the way of results (uhm- guilty in a lot of areas of life on that one!) but for me one of the things I love about fitness/exercise is that is breaks down so many walls. When you have X number of reps left and you are just at the end of yourself there is NO filter on your mind. I see a deep part of myself that I don’t see in every day life. When I feel like I have nothing left to give and I want to give up because I just can’t do it… What goes through my mind? Usually I am able to finish the workout and it really leaves me wondering about things I give up on in everyday life just before the victory. I could preach all day about this. Just KNOW you are making yourself better, regardless of what the scale or measurements say.
Barefoot Hippie Girl says
Just a thought…your shoulders are going to get bigger with the kind of workouts you are doing. It is going to be a different look that before. They will be strong as opposed to flabby or whatever. But, they probably will be buffer. I am a swimmer and I definitely noticed a difference in that whole chest, upper arm, shoulder region when I upped the mileage. Be encouraged.
Olivia says
Thanks for sharing, I really need to kick myself into gear and get up before the kiddos. I know that’s the “secret”… doing it before anyone else is awake.
I do have a question though, do you get to bed early before your workouts? How often do you work out per week? A part of me feels like it should be everyday so it becomes a habit like brushing your teeth. I could never go to bed without brushing my teeth, ha! : )
Carly Anderson says
You look AWESOME! This is an amazing commitment you have made, and I’m sure at times it’s exhausting…..but I’m so impressed! Keep it up my friend!
Carly
http://www.lipglossandcrayons.com
Jenn says
I am so glad that you are actually updating about your fitness routines! I have seen some bloggers say they will but never do! it is definitely encouraging to see you do so! I also think that it helps that you work out with a group of gals who are your age & can keep you accountable – wa hoo! 🙂
I was curious what your husband thinks about your fitness routine & if he is going to be joining you?
Thanks! Jenn